Looking back now, my way to “A Course in Miracles” probably all started in 1969 when I accepted Jesus my personal Lord and Savior, underneath the influence of the Campus Crusade for Christ. However, after joining a Christian brotherhood of aspiring monks, where I was daily quizzed on what many Bible verses I had memorized and could recite verbatim, I was totally confused by it all. Their version of reality just didn’t sit well with me. I felt just like a parrot of Bible verses, that I didn’t even begin to comprehend, or the city crier that nobody wished to hear. Jesus would show me more, much more.
As divine synchronicity would have it, I ingested a hallucinogen that resulted in a near death experience the day after Christmas, 1970. When I was in the black void, with only the consciousness that “I Am”, George Harrison’s song My Sweet Lord began playing. That was my voice singing to God, not George’s! Soon a fantastic white light began appearing from the darkness, as my soul sang “I actually want to help you Lord “.Then somebody started to emerge from the light. This Holy One oscillated between masculine and feminine. As I’d been praying to Jesus, I thought it may be him, but without a beard. I started crying from the depths of my soul, as the Holy One communicated telepathically into my heart. I knew this Being to be just pure love. Then it absolutely was over. I was shot back to my body, hearing the words to a fresh song telling me “it’s been quite a long time coming, it’s going to be quite a long time gone.” How true that has been.
Annually later, I saw the cover of Autobiography of a Yogi. It was Paramahansa Yogananda who’d come if you ask me! Next came meeting Baba Ram Dass, who confirmed that I wasn’t crazy and stated that Yogananda had appeared to many young spiritual seekers on drugs. He also autographed my copy of Be Here Now. My next decade was spent as an aspiring yogi and practicing Yogananda’s Self-Realization Fellowship lessons and exercises, chanting, meditating and receiving initiation into Kriya yoga. Yogananda’s path and linage of gurus brought the essential clarity for me personally to comprehend Jesus and Christianity better. Yogananda also showed me the essential truth behind the oneness of all religions. And he brought me to Babaji, the Mahavatar who sent him to America in the 1920s. Since I heard the name Babaji, I knew I knew Him. He and Jesus work together, behind the scenes, in the cosmic scheme of things. And Babaji was to be the next phase in my own ongoing spiritual evolution. However, I didn’t know at this point that He’d supposedly manifested a human anatomy again and was residing in the small village of Haidakhan, in northern India. That will come later, along with the mystery and myth of the current manifestation.
After hearing Bhagavan Das sing, I bought a dotara and began chanting mantras to God daily. This simple, ancient two- stringed instrument is simple to play and lets one follow the drone sound into silence. At this point, I purchased my own personal invest the woods and met a man who’d lived with Babaji. He conducted a Vedic fire ceremony that Babaji had taught him to initiate my new abode. I questioned and grilled him repeatedly, asking if this new Babaji was exactly the same entity Yogananda had written about. Yes, one and exactly the same but peoples egos still question His true identity. Babaji’s new Kriya yoga was the road of truth, simplicity and love while performing karma yoga- work – and keeping one’s mind on God, message of a course in miracles through repetition of the ancient mantra Om Namaha Shivaya. Babaji stated that this mantra alone was stronger than a lot of atomic bombs and His 1-800 number. I started at this point seriously doing japa, or the repetition of the mantra on 108 rudraksha beads, to obtain this vibration into my sub consciousness. I also learned many approaches to chant it on my dotara. With all of this going on, I bought “A Course in Miracles” and began the daily lessons immediately. I tried to produce sense of the Text but got nowhere; each sentence bogged me down and had to be re-read over a lot of times to assimilate. I was just too young, I told myself. I was thirty-three. I’d deal with this Text later, someday, maybe.
Then after having a year of being married, our home burns down- a real karmic fire ceremony. In the ashes, untouched by the fire, was a photo of Babaji and His cymbals from Haidakhan. Talk about miracles! Next, was the unexpected news that we have a baby coming, after losing everything? My marriage started to dissolve quickly after I fell twenty feet off a roof, breaking my body in twelve places. Surviving death, I was put back to college for couple of years to be retrained, while my ex-wife and son left for the Southwest. That is when every one of my abandonment issues generated extreme drinking alone. After graduation, I left for India to see Babaji’s ashram, as He’d already left His physical body again, and to pray for help with my life in the most spiritual country on earth. I attended the 1995 Kumbha Mela festival with ten million others and lo and behold, who should appear? It was Babaji, asking me if I was having fun. Yes, but I couldn’t talk to answer Him! Then He disappeared back to the crowd, leaving me blown away. Returning state side, I finished up following my ex- wife and son to the Southwest, where my next thing was peyote meetings with the Native Americans for quite some time to come. Everything I’d read and studied in the Course was evident on the medicine inside that tipi. God Is. I learned more in one single night than I had in years of studying metaphysical books. But I didn’t practice all I’d learned and I let my depressed ego, alcohol and abandonment issues take me closer to death’s very door. However, as fate, karma and prayers would have it, I finished up in prison for 2.5 years on an aggravated DUI, in place of dead, where I came across the Courses’Manual for Teachers within our library. Soon, I had the entire book submitted absolve to prisoners and was reintroduced to Jesus again, with all the time I wanted to examine every word of the lengthy text. After 20 years, I should be old enough to obtain it now! Over time and with the aid of the Course, I was finally in a position to forgive myself for the bizarre life my ego had constructed. Used to do the daily lessons again, attempting to see the face of Christ within each inmate. That was not an easy one. But I left prison a changed, free sober man, much better for the knowledge and with an initial draft book about all of it under my belt. Today, I have eight years of sobriety under my belt and my book Still Singing, Somehow won the fall Pinnacle Book Achievement Award. This can be a very condensed version of my story- an odyssey of just one soul’s karma.Read More